just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
this hospital has no fireball
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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