You're a womanizer and a bitch.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
