Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
