the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
