I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
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You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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