i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
