Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
