I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
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You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
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You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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