Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize