I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
