i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
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I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
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He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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