big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
