So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
