I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize