She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
