This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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