ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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