no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
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