If that was your dad, he is hot
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
