Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
