Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you didnt know i had herpes?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
This is my life. Enjoy the view
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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