I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
