There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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