I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
