i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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