Do you still have your period?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
