I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
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We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
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tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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