can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You are a genius and a whore.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
