At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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