I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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