i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Randomize
