know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
