he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize