after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
