My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
