I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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