who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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