Fine. I'll sleep in my office
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
