JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I have post one night stand depression
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