did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
