But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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