woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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