rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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