ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Please don't give away my fajitas
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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