so that wasnt chicken after all
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.