So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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