Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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