She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
i need some magic done to my vagina
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
