Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
