He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
So much Jack, so little girl.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
