Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
He? As in you personified your dick?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
